Monday, April 14, 2008

Rock Band to slip to September for Aus


News dropped this week about the slight price hike in their version of Rockband. By slight I mean twice the amount of its US counterpart, not to mention some baffling bundling, which includes the entirely useless 'All the instruments but not the game' edition which is great if you just want to sit in front your dormant TV banging on plastic drums and sobbing.

That's really sucks for you Europe, it really does. Well, buck up, because your aren't THE most fucked in the arse territory in the world.

Ebgames AU website is now suggesting September as a release for Australia. Are you fucking kidding me. Could we be any less of a priority?

Seeing as we already pay double what our US friends pay for games, I can't wait to see the price insanity that Rockband will bring. $400? Why not!?

If you offer a starving man a shit sandwich, chances are he's going to eat it.

-Brother N-

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Grandios fuck you, Theft of content and Automatic censorship

A couple of months ago I pre-ordered the 'I have more money than sense' edition of Grand Theft Auto IV. The idea of it being censored didn't even enter my head as GTA: San Andreas was left untampered here in Australia.

I was one of the early adopters of GTAIII who was lucky enough to get the game before OFLC decided to take a hacksaw to it. When GTA: Vice City reared its tightly permed head it became obvious that our government again wanted to play babysitter and decide what we should play. I decided to grab a copy from the progressive nation of New Zealand, where instead of changing the content they change the rating system.

Preemptively I again got the next installment, GTA: San Andreas from New Zealand. This turned out to be a waste of time as the AU version had nothing altered in it, but still contains the elements that had the game originally altered.

Odd.

Apart from the obvious 'average age of gamers in Australia is 28" argument, which is now a pile of mince where a dead horse once was, my main sticking point is the lack of consistency.

One year it's ok to bag hookers, then the next year it's not. Graffiti is banned (see Marc Eckos: Getting Up), illegal street racing isn't (see NFS Underground series). Severing limbs, banned (see Dark Sector). Explosives tearing off limbs, fine and dandy (see too many to mention). Purchasing and consuming drugs, no probs (see Saints Row). Non-playable unfinished sex minigame buried in code, PULL THAT SHIT OFF THE SHELVES! (see GTA:San Andreas)

Saving kids or nannying adult gamers?

In a society in which I can happily buy shit that has categorically been proven to fucking kill you (see Tabacco products, Alcohol, Gilmore Girls dvds) I am unable to buy a game in which I might see a poorly rendered titty.

Fuck you.

Protest and buy your game from New Zealand.

-Brother N-

PS. YOU AREN'T THE BOSS OF ME!!